Tag: love

Travel, whether for work or for pleasure, can be a chore. Away from your home, your family, your normal routines, you focus on where you are and how to fill the time. Especially if you are waiting in a crowded airport when your plane is delayed.  In this current trip, uncomfortably still on crutches, going through security I realized my ereader, just updated with four new titles, remained safely in the docking station in my home office. Travelling with only work equipment, I scramble to download something to read that will download to my personal phone. It is in this frame of mind that I started to read An American Marriage by Tayari Jones.

The title is a bit misleading – while this chronicles the story of a marriage, it is actually a study in the strengths and limits of love, in all different shapes and forms.  The story begins with Roy and Celestial. By mapping out the relationship by way of different perspectives, you see that these two have entered marriage with different expectations. They play at being married, sparring over everything, and not truly understanding the “communion” of the institution. Both come from homes based upon second chances, surrounded full of love and commitment. Then the scary reality of being a black man in the wrong place at the wrong time, the pair is forced to face the hardship of a forced but unjust separation.

As the years go by, life charges on. Trying to survive on the promise of dreams, finding strength within oneself to pursue them alone, and realizing the foundation of the marriage was not as strong as expected changes both. The stories told from both perspectives bring the realization that the base of the marriage was lacking, provoking guilt, grief and denial at different times.

These same revelations are shown when the stories turn to the parents. Big Roy and Olive were entirely devoted to each other. Olive had been through the passion and came through the fire alone with her son. When she met Roy, after making it clear it was a package deal, they made a commitment to each other. And the devotion continued to be shown each day until the last, when Big Roy made sure that Olive was buried by the one who loved her most, filling in the grave himself. Similarly, Celestial’s parents came together after they met when he was married to someone else. Another father devoted to the new family he built on a firm foundation – symbolized by the old hickory tree in the yard.

And then there is the love between a parent and a child. Big Roy fully embracing Little Roy; Andre embraced by Mr Henderson, Little Roy and the Biological, and even Dre and his father. Even if people leave, that does not mean they don’t care. Spoiler – finding out that Olive gives up the fight once she realizes there is someone taking care of her son was very different from the belief that Big Roy had once he hear Celestial told Olive the Biological was watching over Little Roy.

Stereotypes would be easy to fall back upon here, but the depth of these characters and the basic understanding of the underlying social injustice for the black community runs below the surface of the story. Paralleled in the river where Roy goes each day to contemplate, the river of injustice can be heard if you listen closely. The reality of it being there, always under the bridge to elsewhere, is the current running through each story. This is a most powerful image – the current remains, even if there is a bridge over it, you can’t always take it to the other side, just as The Hick is a metaphor for a marriage.

This book still surprises me as I process it. Very powerful, and beautifully written.